Paul Blake

Expat VoicesOpinionTravel
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Final Destination

by Paul Blake

 

People often ask what it is like to live in another country, but no one asked what it is like to die in one. I pondered this question as I put Kevin’s ashes on the TSA’s customs conveyor belt in Newark, New Jersey, just after a contentious exchange with a wannabe cop, who did his best obtaining a GED. The ashes were already spread upon the Saigon River.

What was left, I was told, were the bones inside of an urn, inside a cubed box one might ship a small globe or 5 kilos of cashews from Australia. But it was my friend Kevin’s human remains, and I didn’t want to make a scene. I tried to discreetly slip insecure Officer Power Penis an official US Embassy letter and a certification from the Ministry of Health and Disease Control, which clearly stated the remains were in good health based on the number of red stamps on the documents.

As I passed the certified stamped papers, I hoped it would sufficiently explain why I was traveling internationally with human bones, as I figured it may be a red flag as it passed through the x-ray baggage machine.

However, an official letter alerted Captain Self-Important more than the 8,372 bags before, which contained foreign products from socks to microchips to lotus seeds that could unravel the economics of freedom quicker than Sargent Ball Fondler could read a sentence. “What’s this??!!!” he shouted as his routine of doing nothing was interrupted. “Sir,” I whispered, “I am carrying human remains and this is the paperwork.”

“Just put it through!” he said callously and it created a moment of uncomfortable silence as I stepped forward.

Then Agent Asshole added loudly, “NO ONE CARES!” Welcome to Newark I thought.

Then there was … Read more

Tech
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Remove bloatware off your Android with ADB

By Paul Blake

How to get rid of the 80 pre-installed apps on your Vstar phone.

Be aware that only VOS 3 and Android 10 on a Vstar Active 3 have been tested with this. While it probably functions on other Vstar phones, you should proceed with caution and refrain from uninstalling any additional items from this list. I frequently bricked my phone so you don’t have to. Because you will lose everything, make a backup of your phone first. (Take note that the Active 3 did not support the ADB backup function or the built-in Google backup; as a result, you should think about using a third-party backup program for installed apps. Recently installed apps are not remembered in this version of Play. )

Please be aware that removing (uninstalling) essential components like MediaTek and Vdefense (Device Protection) will result in the bricking of your phone. Only after you install an alternative keyboard, mail client, calendar app, and launcher will the phone work. Niagra Launcher, Brave Browser, Signal (sms), Proton Mail/Calendar, Openboard, Stingle Photos, and various Simple Mobile Tools suites like Files, Dialer, Contacts, and Gallery Pro make up my personal setup. Following installation, you must modify the default apps in settings. If you run these scripts without installing a launcher or setting it to default, your phone may be stuck on the starting-up screen. Even without a launcher or keyboard, you can access the Play store to install from a dropdown menu to access Play, but if you can’t figure out how to access applications, you may need to perform a factory reset. Before uninstalling VStar and Google bloatware, you must set your alternative applications to default.

It should be noted that even if you disable the majority of Google, Vstar, and Android bloatware, your Android may … Read more