Ho Chi Minh City—Red-eyed and stinking of cheap, stale cigarettes and Saigon Green, teacher Molly defended her nine-day absence from work due to her exploration of different letters of the alphabet. She insists that she performs her best listening and correction of ESL students after a night of cooking up horse tranquilizers in the form of Ketamine. “Sometimes I take the kids out in the yard to play Horse with a basketball. It teaches them spelling and English, and they get exercise after their International school moms force-feed them French fries from McDonald’s,” remarked Molly, as she spat from her bad teeth, slowly increasing her volume for no apparent reason.
Molly claims that her unconventional methods offer a unique educational experience. “You see, when I’m high on Special K, I can truly appreciate the depth and nuance of the alphabet. Letters like ‘E’ aren’t just shapes to me; they become vibrant characters waiting to be explored,” she added, her eyes glazing over. “And what better way to illustrate the letter ‘E’ than with a little bit of ecstasy? It’s all about feeling, with letters and life itself!”
When questioned about the absence of traditional teaching methods, school administrators responded cautiously. “While we applaud creativity in teaching, we must also consider the well-being of our students and the integrity of our curriculum,” said Principal Nguyen, adjusting her glasses. “We’re currently evaluating whether this ‘letter of the day’ approach aligns with our educational standards.”
Despite the controversy, Molly remains unfazed. “Education should be an exploration—like a wild trip through the cosmos of letters!” she declared, channeling what she referred to as her *inner innovator*. “I just want my students to feel free, to express themselves, and to spell without the chains of conventionality holding them back.”
As students continue to bask in the glow of Molly’s unconventional teaching style, we are witnessing the birth of a new educational paradigm, the whims of a teacher who’s lost her way in a haze of colorful letters and substances.